​In some respects, it seems that time has flown by (we can’t believe it’s almost finished).  In other ways, it seems like forever ago that we left to come.
Here are a few things we have learned, not in any particular order.
People are most important – we have done many things and seen much of this beautiful country, but we value most the relationships we have built.  We have created eternal friendships that will last despite the distance.
We have seen the value of a longer term view.  People do not change quickly.  They need time and most of all they need to trust.

​We do not change quickly either.  Some of the habits we look most forward to continuing have been developed over many months and have evolved slowly.  One of these is doing weekly planning together.  Our weekly calendars have improved through our mission, and we have learned the value of being on the same page.
There are things that we hope to never take for granted again, like being able to drink the tap water and driving without cars coming at us rapidly from every direction.  We may be tempted to park on the sidewalk, however.  My wife tells me I am not allowed to park on the sidewalk when I get home.
We will likely never fully understand the emotional scars caused from living under Communism, but we have truly grown to appreciate those people who lived through that period and who have an optimistic, positive view of life and of the future.

s​We have learned that less is often more.  Most people here have very little of the “nicer” things in life, but many live lives full of purpose and hope.  They don’t have much, but insist on giving everything they have, especially when it comes to feeding us.  We fear we may have offended some by not being able to eat another bite.
Communication can take place when there is sufficient desire, even when language is a barrier.  The people have been very grateful for our clumsy efforts to speak their language, but we are certainly not fluent in Romanian.  Sometimes not many words are spoken, yet feelings are conveyed on a deeper level and we know that we have communicated.
Romania is a hidden treasure.  It is full of natural beauty, resources and amazing people.
We have learned the value of working as a team.  We have discovered (fortunately) that we are good at it and the final products of our combined efforts are better than either of us would have produced alone.
Families are important everywhere.  We can typically start a relationship with someone by asking about their family.   We look forward to spending quality time with our families and appreciate the love and support we feel from them.

​February is a month when we hear many expressions of love.  There’s Valentine’s Day, and between our two families, lots of birthdays.  I don’t wish in any way to question the sincerity of any of these expressions.  I have realized, though, that there is something very deep here that is worth exploring.  At home, I have a file labeled “Love will find a way.”  Our friend Alex in Romania says “Love creates ways.”

​While this thought has been on my mind for a few days, I haven’t known exactly how to say it, until one of the speakers in church shared the perfect illustration.  She visited Israel many years ago with a study abroad program.  One afternoon, while standing on a hill overlooking a lake, he heard a man’s voice.  At first, she didn’t see him, but in a moment, she saw a man dressed in long robes come around the side of the hill below her.  He was singing a very simple yet compelling tune.  He was followed by a long line of sheep.  There was plenty of green grass everywhere, but they didn’t stop to graze.  They followed the humble shepherd out of sight.  Why?  She offered this powerful explanation.  He was there when they were born.  He nurtured them when they were sick or injured, and carried them when they were unable to walk.  He protected them from danger.  From birth, they looked to this humble shepherd in every aspect of their lives.

​Similarly, I have seen countless times when love has found a way when every other motivation (wealth, obligation, fear) failed.  The love of a parent (especially a mother) endures and sacrifices when there is no possibility of anything in return.  Love can be creative, seeking solutions, when other forces weaken or become distracted.  It is not dependent on events or behaviors.
I share one example.  When my first wife Shelley died, I was sustained for many months by family and friends and the pull of a demanding church calling.  When the time came for another to assume that responsibility, I found myself in a dark and lonely place.  A close friend then gave me a precious gift, a week of his time.  We rode our bicycles together over a considerable distance, allowing time for conversation, silence and physical exercise.  That week changed my life forever and I will always be grateful.  I felt loved and it lead to healing.

​While the beginning of the year brings the typical making and breaking of resolutions, today we recognize the amazing people we know who have made real change in their lives.  We will not mention them by name, but rather share some things they have in common.
Change frequently comes following an expression of sincere desire and urgency.  There is a realization that the status quo is no longer acceptable, that there must be a change.  The existing patterns and circumstances are causing pain and there seems to be no prospects for things to get better.  Wendy Watson Nelson recently described this state as “anguishing desperation.”   Sometimes people need to reach rock bottom.  In one case, it had to happen twice.

​Further there is recognition that help is needed and, maybe for the first time, there is a reaching out and up.  Previous offers for help are no longer ignored, rather they are welcomed.  This short-term dependency on real friends and God leads to a healthy independence as habits are changed and new skills are learned.  Dependence becomes partnership and team work.  People who have experienced change are now in a position to help others through the process.
Real change requires both the mind and the heart, but starts with the heart.  It is a time to learn to trust and act on the impressions and whispers of the heart, even though they may seem illogical to the mind which is stuck in well-worn ruts.

​We have seen the value of a well thought out plan, including milestones, and even changing physical environments.  Accountability is increased when the plan is shared with others for their support and encouragement.
Finally, there is the important element of not looking back.  Remembering Lot’s wife can help them understand the value of sticking it out until new habits are formed.
We salute the pioneers who have exemplified incredible courage and have given up so much to become better.  Our lives have been forever changed because they were willing to change.

​Like you, we have been doing our share of reflecting these past few days.  This has been a different year for us, having spent it away from “home” in Romania.  While Romania has become very much home, we really miss our family and friends, especially at this time of year.
I am an avowed “80/20 guy”.  Jacque is a “99.99, every i dotted and every t crossed, check and double check gal.”  When I am mentally on to the next project, she often pulls me back to review and fix.  This can be painful, but the final results are better because of her completeness.  At the end of this amazing year, I want to share a few things I have learned about finishing well.  I am obviously doing this for my own benefit.  We have been blessed to have been involved with many diverse efforts, from planning conferences to creating videos.  To the extent that these efforts were successful, the credit is due to Jacque’s careful attention to detail.

​My heroes are finishers, though I hadn’t actually thought about that aspect of their lives until now.
 
George Washington gave his best efforts at the end of his life when he deserved to be enjoying an easy life of retirement.  He said, “the harder the conflict, the greater the triumph.” 
 
Abraham Lincoln never wavered in his determination to do the right thing for our war-torn country and to do it in the right way.  “With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right, as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation's wounds.”
 
My parents valued and lived lives of service right until the ends of their lives.  They were always thinking of what they could do for others, especially on holidays when our floors were filled with “little things for the neighbors.”  Dad loved buying and writing birthday cards as a way to fill his time when mom passed away.

​We celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ because of the way He finished His life.  He said, “To this end, was I born.”  When everything mattered the most and when it was the most difficult, He finished all He was sent to accomplish, and that makes all the difference in our lives now.
 
While I will still be looking for creative ways to start projects and complete them in the most effective ways, I will give more thought to finishing well.  I will seek to enjoy the process and as always the feeling that comes from a job that is well done.

​We feel impressed to share some thoughts about teamwork.  Our mission will be defined by projects and people.  Having just completed some projects and seen significant people in our lives change and grow, we have come to see the value of the team.  Mia Hamm, famed US soccer player, is quoted as saying, “I am a member of a team, and I rely on the team.  I defer to it and sacrifice for it, because the team, not the individual, is the real champion.”

​Let us share two examples.  Thanksgiving is one of our favorite holidays and we wanted to create an atmosphere as close to “home” as we could for the missionaries in and around Bucharest.  We had a good experience last year and knew how much work it was going to be to feed 60 missionaries and guests again.  We were willing but overwhelmed.  However, when the other senior couples here offered to pitch in and help, especially with the preparation and cooking of 90 pounds of turkey, the job became fun again.  The Jeppesens, a couple from Sugar City, Idaho were perfect.  They were totally willing to get theirs hands dirty.  They also had some great ideas to improve the process, which is great because we will be passing the torch to them.  The result was a great meal and good feelings all around.

​The real reason we are here is to help people.  It is often a slow process.  We have been thrilled to see two of the people we have been working with for the last year recently take on responsibilities within the branch.  One will assume responsibility for the library and the other will look after the finances.  Each of them have worked hard to be at the point where they are able to help and they are now grateful for the opportunity to serve.  They want to do the best they can and they feel more connected.   It is truly a win-win situation.

October flew by for us and unfortunately, this blog became a casualty.  I am working to repent and share a few thoughts that I hope will be meaningful.  I want to pay tribute to an institution that has immensely blessed my life and to a great woman.  I am speaking of marriage and of my amazing wife.  In doing so, I recognize that all who read this will not have been similarly blessed.  Nevertheless, I am certain of my feelings and gratitude

​The scripture says, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make an help meet for him.”  That has been my experience.  I am more complete with someone at my side.  I express all the gratitude of which I am capable for Jacque and her willingness and ability to bless my life.  Last month, we celebrated our third anniversary in Romania.  About half of our married life together has been here.  Many of the senior couples we work with have reflected on the challenge of being together 24/7, even after being married for decades.  Many have come shortly after retiring where there was a large component of alone or away time in their relationship.  We knew there was some risk in our own marriage of difficulties resulting from always being together.  Again, I express gratitude for Jacque’s tolerance, patience and willingness to forgive my follies and weaknesses.  She has realized that she married someone who is far from perfect and I have learned so much from her steadiness and grace.

​We have worked individually and together to support marriage, our own and others.  With over 60 years of combined experience and nearly that much time experiencing and observing, our feelings are deepened.  We can say that all the effort and sacrifice we have exerted has been rewarded many fold.  We have learned that there is wisdom in this simple proverb: “Thee lift me and I’ll lift thee, and we’ll ascend together.”  We have learned that we are a great team and can accomplish so much more when we are focused on the same goal, willing to share and contribute our unique capabilities and thoughts, and able to choose the best pieces suited for the task at hand.  There is real synergy when we work that way.
The photos are from our recent journey to northern Romania where we caught the turning of the leaves at the perfect time.

​We're off to a great start with the Pathway program in Bucharest.  We've been thinking, hoping and working to bring this program here for over a year.  It's been thrilling to see it going and how it is already beginning to impact people's lives in a positive way.

People are making great sacrifices to participate.  One of our most active students is a single mother who travels 3 hours each way to be at the weekly gathering meetings.  She is thrilled at the opportunity to get an education.  Many have had to get special permission to flex their work hours.  Most come straight from work and are willing to give up their evening meal.  Of course, Jacque always insists that we provide water and snacks!

Pathway, offered through BYU-Idaho, enables people from all over the world to get a 4-year education in an economical and flexible way.  For many in our class, this is the only way that college would be even remotely possible.  I have also been impressed that many of the teaching methods and objectives are similar to a program at work with almost the same name (Pathways).  Both programs employ powerful adult teaching techniques that encourage individual preparation, active participation and engaging students in many different ways (auditory, visual, and kinesthetic/touch).

This type of education is different that what they've experienced so far in their lives.  They have class peers and English speaking partners.  They are accountable to turn in assignments each week on Wednesday and Saturday.  Each of them will have the opportunity to facilitate one of the classes during the semester.  Some are struggling with the new concepts and methods, but they are open minded and optimistic.  We are pleased to report that most of our class has grades in the mid to high 90's.  Even the two that struggle with English the most are doing well.  We know these are the future leaders in their communities and congregations. 

A real highlight this month was the historic all-Mission Conference held in the mountains near Brasov on August 17-18.  I say historic because the circumstances that allowed this to take place (no missionaries coming or leaving, relatively few internal transfers and the prospect of nice weather) will not likely happen again during the 3-year tenure of our mission president.  He and his wife generously funded a large portion of the expenses to create a unique and lasting experience.  They certainly succeeded. 

The logistics of bringing together all 100 junior and 20 senior missionaries from both Romania and Moldova are complicated, and went smoothly with the exception of a late bus and the delays caused by some very impressive rainstorms.  We were blessed Monday afternoon with an opening in the weather large enough to allow the group to take a hike up the mountain behind the hotel to a beautiful waterfall.  We stopped just before the falls to hear two of our favorite junior missionaries share their feelings about what had been accomplished as the mission worked hard for the last few months to prepare for this conference.  At some moments during their talks, the sunlight poked through the clouds, creating a very memorable moment.

Across the valley, with an incredible view of the mountains where we hiked, is a castle where dinner was hosted.  There are many here, but it is still amazing.  One of the missionaries serenaded each table with his violin.  Afterward, there was a short musical program put on by the junior missionaries.  It was very rewarding just being all together, and to be in that setting, the feelings were magnified.

We met Tuesday morning for a short devotional and then drove to the Brasov building for the main conference meeting.  The subject was renewal followed by sharing.  The source of strength is the scriptures.  We were taught well and made commitments to reach new heights both personally and in terms of helping others.  We were blessed with a great spirit of energy and unity.

Since we were in the “neighborhood,” the day ended with a short trip to Bran Castle, the home of Vlad the Impaler, better known as Dracula.  It was the only opportunity many of the missionaries would have to visit Romania’s most famous landmark.

After every mountaintop experience such as this, there are plateaus.  This has been one of the first weeks in many months where we had nearly complete control of our time.  There were no major conferences to plan, books to print or programs to create.  We have had time to re-group and schedule activities that will help us to grow and develop.  That has included thoughtful study, reviewing our Romanian, writing letters, resolving some issues that have been nagging at us, and thinking deeply about what is really important in our lives.

The young single adult conference we have been planning for eight months was a huge success.  Over 150 participants from 16 countries met at the beautiful Alpin Hotel above Brasov to enjoy an incredible week.  The setting was the perfect fit for the conference theme “Mountains to Climb”, which was selected by the peer committee last November.

The theme was chosen to reflect the obstacles that must be faced and conquered in the lives of these young people including securing a proper education, beginning a career and finding a spouse.   Excellent teachers from all over Europe  addressed these topics in morning classes.  The participants spent their afternoons in workshops of their choice.  They selected among origami, conference choir practice, basic photography, family history and a service project.  They also enjoyed a visit to Bran Castle, a short distance from the hotel, and a hike in the local mountains.

Each evening, powerful speakers from the Church leadership inspired the participants to decide now who they want to become and make positive changes in their lives.  Following the training, there were activities intended to allow the young people to interact and create friendships that can potentially last a lifetime.  They shared talents, played games, danced and competed in the annual Mr. and Miss Mormon contest.

On Friday, 24 July, the group participated in traditional “pioneer” activities to commemorate the entry of the original “Mormon pioneers” into the Salt Lake Valley on that date in 1847.  Pioneer Day is celebrated throughout the Church, and is particularly meaningful for these young people as many of them are first generation members.  They are true pioneers, responsible for creating the traditions that will be celebrated in their families for generations to come.

There was an amazing spirit of cooperation and excitement throughout the conference.  One participant expressed that he was trying to “take advantage of every activity every day before returning to his real life.”  They entered on Tuesday afternoon with lots of anticipation.  Many had made huge sacrifices of time and money to be there.  They left reluctantly on Saturday morning, as friends, having shared an experience together that will better enable them to conquer the mountains they each face.

We heard a great deal about mountains last week.  One was that you can’t stay forever on the top – you must eventually come down.  That’s exactly what we are now experiencing.  We are exhausted and looking forward to a little breather, but very happy that all of the hard work was totally worth it.

This success followed months of preparation and many miracles.  The dubbing was completed in record time.  Choice theaters were secured in key cities.  Technical details were solved.  The fact that we were even able to make the showings was a miracle as all of the other languages scheduled for the rest of 2015 were postponed.  

Perhaps the most significant learning from this journey is the power of inviting as the Savior did, “one by one.”  People were excited and committed to come after they felt a personal connection in a conversation with a member or missionary.  It became personal, just like the experience they had at the theater.  Not only had they been given an opportunity to meet a Mormon, a friendship had been created or strengthened, something that will last much longer than the memory of the movie.

On Saturday, 27 June, Meet the Mormons will be shown in all 20 of our meeting houses in the two countries in Romanian, Russian and English.   We are expecting that over a thousand people will share this experience.  There have been lots of details to think about, but it will all be worth it, if even one person has a great experience and if a few bridges can be built.